More Than Just Feeling Good
by ProfTweety
Summary: They didn't know where making love would lead, if anywhere, but they would figure it out as they went.
1. Chapter 1

_**More Than Just Feeling Good**_

 **Disclaimer** : I own nothing related to _Battlestar Galactica._

 **A/N** : They didn't know where making love would lead, if anywhere, but they would figure it out as they went.

 **A/N2** : _Enjoy_! Please leave a _review_ if y'all's feel so inclined. They are ever so lovely to read and _much_ appreciated. # **TodayIsLife**

~~~~~PT~~~~~

It had been a rough day all around. Tensions were high in both their jobs and sometimes they took it out on each other. Since Laura was staying with Bill in his quarters for the duration of her treatment, or until they found suitable quarters of her own on Galactica, they worked hard not to bring their stress home with them and if they did, not to take it out on each other.

On this particular day, Bill was dealing with Lee leaving the military officially. When he got back to his quarters, he just wanted to drink, again, some more, _too_ _much_ , if he believed Laura. Of course, she finally addressed it as he was going for another refill and he wasn't up to ignoring or deflecting her words. He began pacing until she called him on that too. _Maybe if we just sit and talk_ , he told himself, _it'll be better_. But she wanted to talk about Kara, a subject best left alone given their polar opposite views.

Bill was thinking, though he had trouble voicing the word, that Kara coming back was a miracle. Laura called him _Admiral_ _Atheist_ while goading him to say it. She then went on to explain to him the miracles that had happened to her, beginning with her diagnosis on the day of the attack and ending with words he didn't want to hear, _couldn't_ hear, because he wanted them not to be true. " _I'm dying, Bill._ " No, she couldn't be dying because he didn't want to lose her. Or Kara. Or Lee. He didn't want to lose any of them. When she said he was all bottled up over everything going on, he didn't agree but rather told her to stay out of his head.

He had finished his drink while they were talking and so he went back for another refill. Her comment that he was afraid to live alone earned her a response from him that she was afraid to die that way. It was true and she nodded her agreement. The hurt didn't set in until he mentioned that she was afraid her death would be meaningless, as meaningless as everyone else's. _Her words had stung him and so_ , she told herself, _he stung her back_. But the truth was, she did wonder who would mourn her death. She had no family left, Billy was gone too. She had no lover in her life; Adar had been the last one and that hadn't ended well. Not that she would've expected a happy ending; he was a married man after all.

As he walked away, she tried to maintain her composure. It was slipping and when she played with her hair to calm herself, some of it came off in her hand. No longer able to keep the tears inside, Laura gave in and they spilled out as she tried to stifle the sound of her sobs. There was no reason for Bill to know, no reason for him to see her like that. They'd _both_ said mean things to one another; there was no reason for him to feel guilty and he would've had he seen her crying.

Later, almost done with work, she realized he hadn't come back out for more refills. Assuming he had gone to bed to sleep it off, she sighed and set about finishing up. Once completed, her folders neatly piled, she was deciding between tea and bed; fatigue won out. She made her way through the rooms quietly not wanting to wake him so she was surprised to find him sitting on the couch. He looked lost in thought, not relaxed as she would've expected him to be after downing so much alcohol in one night.

"I'm sorry for what I said before," was her way of announcing her presence. They were friends but both would agree they'd gone too far verbally.

He turned to acknowledge her and realizing what she'd said made him stand up and move a little closer. "Me too," was his way of apologizing but she wasn't feeling it and so she just shook her head and began walking away towards his bedroom. "I'm sorry, Laura," came out softly but loud enough for her to turn back around and face him.

"We both took it too far, Bill." They had so he nodded in agreement. She wanted to ask him why he hadn't gone back out to get more refills but knew that would only start another round and neither of them were up for that. "I'm still welcome here?" He had already said she was but for some reason, in that moment, she was uncertain.

Too many things were hitting him at once and his steely exterior was crumbling. That she would think he wouldn't want her there any longer stung. "Always," he'd rasped.

Taking a deep breath, she looked at the pained expression on his face, the way his body sagged a little as if in defeat. Noticing the extra shine to his eyes, she apologized again. "I shouldn't have pushed you. You have your own way of dealing with things."

"So do you," he muttered but then seemed to think better of it and added, "I'm sorry I'm hurt you."

"We hurt each other, Bill, and," she paused, "I _am_ sorry for that." Her eyes misted and the extra shine matched his.

"Your hair," he began but stopped when her hand flew to the part that was falling out. He wondered if he'd just opened another can of worms. "It's not you," he didn't want to say what he was really thinking; that she'd be beautiful with or without hair.

She gave him a sad smile and shrugged. "It's a big part." Her nervous giggle made him smile a little. "That was vain of me, wasn't it?"

"Yeah," he smiled a bit more, "and not true."

"I have selfish thoughts too," she murmured, eyes focused on the floor.

"We all do. What are yours?" He was hoping they could get back to where they were before their earlier exchange.

She took her time answering; let the words float around her head before speaking them. Lifting her eyes, she forged ahead with the truth. "I want to make love while I still have hair." She waited for his reaction, not sure whether she wanted one or not.

"You have anyone in mind?" He hoped it sounded like a joke and that she would answer as if it was.

"You, Bill," she whispered as her eyes moistened even more, "it's always been you." It was too late when she realized what she'd said. Her words, her desires, were out there.

Without saying a word, he walked quickly over to her and wrapped his arms around her. He felt her relax against him despite being sure she'd stiffen at his touch. He knew her well enough to know she hadn't intended that level of honestly, not with him, not yet.

He held her, neither saying a word. When she pulled back, away from him, he saw the tears and smiled as she used her sleeve to wipe under her nose. No one would ever suspect the President of doing such things. His first instinct was to tease her about it but instead he wiped her tears with his thumbs and kissed where they once were. The feelings were there for both of them but they had responsibilities. The President and the Admiral together probably wouldn't go over well with the members of the fleet.

Her hands found their way to his chest. When he looked at her, she appeared fragile and he wasn't used to seeing her like that; it hurt. His hands were still holding her head. It took only a second of thought before he placed a soft kiss on her lips. Though he expected her to immediately deepen it, she didn't. He kissed her again, lingering this time and felt her respond briefly before backing away a little. The look in her eyes made his tear up again. Hands still on the side of her head, he covered her lips with his own. It was meant to be gentle but wasn't and she responded with equal fervor.

When they stopped, they remained close and he rasped, "Your hair isn't you, Laura. It's _not_ why people care about you."

Sniffling, she corrected him. "It's not why _you_ care, Bill." Feeling him shift his body weight, she assured him, "I care about you too," then kissed him. It was slow and deep. They took their time exploring each other's mouths again as well as their bodies. It had been a long time since they touched each other as more than friends and colleagues.

He knew he couldn't resist her much longer. If she was right, if she was _dying_ , they'd miss their chance. He'd always stopped them on New Caprica; he knew he wouldn't, _couldn't_ deny her what she needed. Not if she was dying which, of course, she couldn't be.

Despite all the thoughts clouding his mind, his hands moved over her body as his tongue danced with hers. When he felt her run her hand along him over his trousers, he began backing her up towards his room.

Halfway there, she pulled him into a tight hug. She knew where he stood on moving beyond a certain level of intimacy between them. He'd fought his feelings for so long but now he was giving in to them, giving in to _her_. Somehow it felt wrong; she didn't want to use him. They _cared_ about each other. "You're more than a frak, Bill," she whispered into his ear. He had told her that on many occasions and it felt right to repeat his words back to him.

"Neither are you," he said before kissing her temple. Moving to look at her, he rumbled, "You said you want to make love, Laura, so let's make love." They came together in an instant, kissing passionately and heading towards his bedroom.

Once inside, she asked him if he was sure. He responded by sitting on his rack to remove his boots and socks. Watching him intently, she removed her shoes and stockings. Standing up, he pulled the blankets back then kissed her again. When she began pulling his outer tank top over his head, he let her then unbuttoned her blouse. She surprised him when, after removing his other tank top, she kissed along his scar, murmuring how strong he was, how much he and his heart had been through.

His eyes clouding over again, he pushed her blouse off her shoulders and down her arms, finally just letting it go to float its way to the floor. Their passion increased even more; their hands opening the other's pants and pushing them down till they fell the rest of the way on their own. As they each stepped out of them, his hands wound around her back to open her bra. Being able to push his boxers down made her smile. This was the furthest they'd ever gotten. He managed to push her panties down despite losing concentration as her hand moved along him. During a particularly passionate kiss, they made their way onto his bed, neither caring how less-than-elegant their minor fumble actually was.

On top of her, he kissed her lips, her eyes, down along her neck and back up. She sucked on his ear lobe, grazed her nails along his back, not leaving any marks, and then licked, sucked and nipped her way down and back up his neck. His groans made her body react more than it ever had before. She practically ached to have him inside her.

When he rolled off her, she began to wonder what happened until she felt his finger on her nub. Legs parting of their own accord, she pulled him back into a heated kiss as he moved his finger in and out of her, his thumb now rubbing her nub, bringing her over the edge faster than either of them expected. As her breathing regulated, he kissed her neck, her lips and her breast. Sliding down, he mouthed her breast before continuing. She gasped the first time she felt his tongue on her, flicking or circling her nub, lapping up her juices, then going back to playing with her bud. The sounds she made had him more excited than he ever remembered being in the past. Maybe he had been but it'd been awhile and she was so very vocal and responsive that she took over all of his senses at once. Kissing his way back, he only stopped his trail to circle her nipple and suck on her breast once more before claiming her mouth. If he thought she missed that he ignored the breast with the cancer, he was mistaken.

"Gods, Bill, I want you," was all she managed to get out between kisses.

"I want you too, Laura," he'd responded breathlessly. With that, he started to enter her. Her legs were wide apart, leaving him room to get comfortable before they wrapped around his waist, attempting to pull him in further.

As he moved slowly within her, she moaned and asked him to go faster. When he maintained the same speed, she opened her eyes to looked at him and moaned, "Please, Bill," before kissing him and tightening her legs around him in an attempt to get what she wanted, what she needed, from him.

"You wanted to make love, Laura. Taking our time is lovemaking to me." He had her going over the edge not long after he finished speaking.

Her body was on fire; her intimate areas were so aroused and so sensitive but she wanted more. Rolling them over, he smiled at the sight of her riding him slowly as she rubbed herself. "I want to do that for you," he whispered as he replaced her fingers with his thumb.

"Oh, Gods, Bill," she groaned as he brought her to crescendo once again.

Rolling them back over, never breaking their connection, he pushed her legs together with his as he moved them outside of hers. The look on her face made him think she wasn't used to that position or hadn't ever done it. Pushing inside of her slowly and pulling back out at the same speed had her bucking against him, moaning and whispering words of _want_ and _need_ that she'd probably regret if she ever realized he _had_ , in fact, heard and understood her. When her waves crashed against the shore yet again, he moved his legs back between hers and when she wrapped them around his waist, he picked up speed. He was an old man as many called him and he'd surprised himself with how long he'd lasted but the end was nearing. The friction he caused as he crashed in and out of her, seeking his own release, brought hers on as well and they went over the cliff simultaneously. "I love you, Laura," slipped out and he groaned.

Lying wrapped up in one another as their breathing regulated and the air cooled their sweaty skin, he noticed how relaxed she looked without trying and how her hand never stilled. Satisfaction brought a smile to face; not only from the lovemaking but from the fact that she continued to touch him once it was over. Her fingers danced lightly along his chest, his arm and his face though she hadn't looked at him since they'd found themselves a comfortable position. Wanting to see her eyes again, he put his hand under her chin and signaled for her to look up. When she did, he noticed they were moist. "Are you regretting this already?" he asked, concern for her mixed with hurt for himself.

"No, I'm not," she reassured him gently. She had been looking for release, for comfort and for that intimate connection with him he'd never before allowed. She was sure he hadn't _intended_ on admitting his feelings for her. She was just as sure she _couldn't_. "Are you?" she asked, somewhat nervously. His eyes boring into hers, she teared up as she admitted, "I can't say it back, Bill."

He swallowed hard before asking, "Just now or never, Laura?"

Looking at him then, she realized she'd hurt him without even trying. "Just now," she replied, barely above a whisper, while never breaking eye contact.

"Okay," he murmured before kissing her gently then pulling her even closer to him.

A few minutes later, he heard her call his name softly. When he acknowledged hearing her, she spoke into his chest, not daring to see the look in his eyes. "This was more than just feeling good," she promised.

"I'm glad," he rasped and she knew his eyes would show the emotions she wasn't yet ready to witness.

Once she heard his breathing become softer, thinking he was asleep and feeling so much closer to him, she whispered, "My father and two sisters, one of whom was pregnant, were killed by a drunk driver on their way home from my place."

He felt the tears on his chest before he answered. "I'm sorry, I'll cut back." Kissing the top of her head, he was surprised when she moved and captured his lips for a long, languid kiss. After she turned around, they both fell asleep.

She slept solidly until she felt his hand moving along her body, ghosting over her core until he finally began massaging her nub. It felt good to be wanted and she let herself go with what he was making her feel. Tumbling over the cliff, she turned to kiss him as he moved on top of her and buried himself deep within her.

Moving quickly, the sweat sprang forth on his forehead before she'd found the right words. "Slow down, Bill," she encouraged, "you're not sneaking in one last frak before we break up." He stilled then looked at her as she stroked his face. "We're not over if you don't want us to be."

"You're the President," he mumbled.

"That didn't stop us last night," she reminded him. "I'm just _Laura_ , Bill. Even having to keep this part of us to ourselves, I'm just Laura with _you_."

Rather than speak, he kissed her deeply and began moving slowly inside her. They each professed wanting more than what was allowed before going over the cliff together.

As they lay there resting, he wondered how long this new arrangement would last. They disagreed about what to do with Kara. She wasn't happy with his son for revealing her secret during the trial and now he'd be a part of the Quorum meaning she'd have to deal with Lee when she didn't want to. She also hadn't mentioned no longer wanting her own quarters on his ship. _If it all ended that morning_ , he decided, _he'd remain happy he hadn't missed the opportunity to be with her_. Regardless of the reasons it happened or stopped, if it did.

She was wondering how long they'd manage an intimate relationship as well. Between their titles and responsibilities, Lee and Kara, the people of the fleet gossiping about her living with him, and the fact that she was dying, she didn't know how they'd possibly pull it off. But she _did_ know that she felt comfortable telling him about her family; he was supposed to be asleep, yes, but she wanted to say the words to him. The fact that he heard and responded hadn't frightened her the way she thought it would. "I want us to make love as often as we can for as long as we can," she whispered.

"I want that too," he whispered back. Kissing the top of her head and pulling her closer, he repeated, "I want that too, Laura."

"We'll figure it out, Bill," she promised with more confidence than she felt. "This was more than just feeling good."

She knew she had said that before they went to asleep the night before but she needed him to know she meant it. She couldn't say she loved him. She couldn't promise him a lifetime together because her body was killing her. She couldn't make his hurt or his fear about losing her just disappear. But she _could_ offer him solace in as many ways as he needed. "Did you hear what I was saying to you last night while we made love?"

"Yeah," he answered but wasn't sure if honesty was the way to go just then. He was almost certain her words _weren't_ meant for him to hear.

"I'm glad," she told him as she looked up at him. "I _wanted_ you to hear me but a part of me was _afraid_ that you would," she admitted.

"I'm glad I heard you." He sighed. Neither of them would admit they had no idea where their relationship was going or if it was going anywhere. "No matter what happens after we leave this bed, Laura, when more hair falls out and you can't look in the mirror, come to me. We'll shave it and then we'll make love."

"I will," she promised with a gentle kiss. Laying her head on his chest, she tried to turn off all the thoughts floating through her mind. She was staying in his quarters while she received her treatments from Dr Cottle. She stayed in his bed when they both needed the closeness. She let him give her the one thing he'd held off so long from sharing, _himself_.

They didn't know where making love would lead, if anywhere, but they would figure it out as they went.

[ **TBC** ]


	2. Chapter 2

_**More Than Just Feeing Good, Ch 2**_

 **Disclaimer** : I own nothing related to _Battlestar Galactica._

 **A/N** : He knew her insistence for her own quarters would rear up again so he'd have to actually look but he could do so slowly and perhaps, in time, she'd change her mind.

 **A/N2** : _Enjoy_! Please leave a _review_ if y'all's feel so inclined. They are ever so lovely to read and _much_ appreciated. # **TodayIsLife**

~~~~~PT~~~~~

She had felt him leave the bed, heard the shower running then watched him get dressed. It was too early for his shift, which she knew, so she wondered what he hadn't yet told her. Sitting up, she asked what was going on.

Kissing her gently, "I have something to take care of. Go back to sleep."

"I'll just start work early unless you'd like to talk about what this something is."

"Later," he said as he began walking away.

They hadn't had the chance to speak during the work day. Until he showed up during her treatment and sat down without a word before he began reading to her, she was thinking they wouldn't see other at all until dinner.

Hearing his voice soothed her nerves and thus her nausea. The more she relaxed, the better she felt and she was grateful that he wanted to be so involved. She knew it was because of his feelings for her but she hadn't returned the sentiment and yet he still wanted to be there for her. That made her feel warm, calm and safe but at the same time it didn't because it felt one-sided, it felt unfair to him.

At the end of her treatment, Cottle came to check on her before unhooking everything. "Get some rest," he advised as she thanked him and prepared to leave. The doctor watched as his friend put his arm out for her to hold onto; she immediately took it with a bright smile. Cottle saw the look on his friend's face in return and he knew.

Once back in his quarters, she headed for the couch. "What'd you do about Kara?" The question seemed loud in the quiet room.

"You need to lie down. We'll talk in bed." Taking off his jacket, he laid it over the couch and put his hand out to her, surprised when she took it without fussing.

Once they were lying down on top of the covers, no lights on, he answered her. "I let her go," he sighed, his hand holding his head. "You were right. I don't want to lose her again," he admitted.

"You don't want to lose any of us," she offered quietly as she turned to face him.

"That's true," he conceded. "I'll be damned if I let go without a fight."

"If only you could save us all," she murmured, "with just the amount of fight you have in you."

"You should be pissed at me."

"The woman in your bed, right here, right now, understands you needed to do something. I'd like you to explain what that _something_ is because the _President_ will have to cover your ass." When he started making rumbling sounds, she put her hand on his chest. "I _will_ do that, Bill, but I want to know what I'm covering up."

"Helo and I created a crew for her and I made Helo her XO." He sighed again. "I'm not a complete fool, Laura. I knew I needed someone to keep an eye on her."

"Helo will do what's right," she agreed.

"I gave her the Demetrius. It's an old sewage recycling ship." He could only imagine what she'd say to that.

Nodding her head, "That seems very apropos."

"A shit ship for a frakked up job." He sounded defeated. He was tired of doubting, tired of losing, and tired of fighting. "I believed her when she said she wouldn't stop until she was dead."

"I'd better improve my aim then," she smirked. She kissed his cheek before assuring him, "I'll cover for you but the Press is going to have a field day with this once it gets out. And it _will_ get out, Bill."

"I know it will, Laura, and you'll take the brunt of it. For _that_ , I'm sorry but I'm _not_ sorry I let her go."

"I know," she soothed and snuggled into him.

They were silent for a couple of minutes while his hand slowly moved up and down her back. "She thought I was putting her out in the middle of the night," he suddenly said very quietly.

"As if you'd ever do that to _her_ of all people," she answered without moving.

"When she was in the brig, she made me angry. I knocked her down."

"Whatever she said must've been true," she hesitated, "and personal." Her mind was racing. "It was about me or us."

He debated telling her what Kara had called him but figured she'd eventually find out from someone else and that'd be far worse. "She called me your wet nurse," he admitted softly, "so I knocked her down and held her by her throat but I didn't squeeze."

"I'm sorry, Bill. I knew this was a bad idea." She began to leave the bed but he stopped her by wrapping his arm around her.

"I want you to stay here with me."

"I don't want people talking about you. I don't give a frak about myself but I won't let them gossip about you." She tried to pry his arm off her so he tightened his grip. "Please let me go." Her voice cracked on every word.

"I can't," came out softer than she'd ever heard before; she thought by then she'd heard his entire range.

"I need my own quarters, Bill, or maybe I should just start staying in Sick Bay," she offered. "Then people will stop talking about you."

"I don't give a frak what they say," he ground out.

Accepting that he wasn't going to let go, she managed to turn in his arms. "I _do_ and I won't let it continue," she declared.

"Stay," was all he said. Pain crossed his features briefly and he closed his eyes as he tugged for her to resume lying down with him. She did and snuggled into him again. Before she knew it, she fell asleep. The treatments took a great deal out of her and resting afterwards really was all she could do.

Waking up in the same position some time later, she looked at him. His eyes were closed but he wasn't asleep. "You must be in pain by now," she said as she began to move away.

"I'm not," he murmured, holding her to him. "Stay," was his only follow-up.

Without further elaboration on his part, she couldn't be sure if he meant living with him in general or just stay in his bed right then. "I do need my own quarters, Bill, so they stop talking about you. I'd like you to keep looking."

"I am, I will," he promised, kissing the top of her head. "Try to eat some dinner when it gets here."

She looked at him and smiled softly. "Don't frak with your reputation because of me." She thought he'd have some sort of comeback but he just put one hand behind her head and kissed her. It was slow and gentle yet filled with emotion. "I want you but dinner will be here soon and we don't need this getting around too."

"They already think we are," he informed her with a wink then laughed at the glare she attempted. When she finally just sighed and shook her head, he kissed her again. "I don't care, Laura."

"Well, I do and I better _never_ personally hear anyone say something about you."

He spent the next few seconds just looking at her. "You're action, not words, Laura," he rasped before kissing her again.

The look on his face, the emotion in his eyes and the hidden meaning behind his words all combined within her and she felt a little unsettled. Not wanting to let on that she understood what he meant, that she was rattled by the possibility of it being true, she just promised, "I'll protect you, Bill," and slowly sat up.

They only discussed work-related topics over dinner and it dawned on him that she was hiding. This made him wonder if maybe he was right after all. It felt like she loved him, she just couldn't say it.

By bedtime, he still didn't want to push her so he waited to see what she'd do. She went through her nightly routine quietly, not saying a word. He brushed his teeth and undressed in the bathroom, giving her time to undress in his bedroom.

Nearing the bed, lights out already, he heard her sultry voice. "You'll need to take your boxers off."

Doing as she suggested, he climbed into bed to find her wearing nothing beneath the covers. He felt himself instantly respond. "We both want to protect each other, Laura."

"That means something, I know, Bill, just not yet." She had combined two thoughts into that one sentence and hoped he understood her true meaning.

He did and ran his fingers along her jaw line and down her neck, continuing on to tweak her breast before she pulled him closer to her and covered his mouth with hers. Their tongues danced slowly at first but their passion grew quickly.

"I want you to touch me," she whispered and his hand began moving towards her core. Taking it, she moved it up towards her breast, the one he ignored.

"No," he protested, voice thick with emotion.

Her eyes became wet as she insisted, "It's a part of me, Bill."

"A part that's trying to take you from me," he growled. "I can't," he added in a softer tone and caressed her face. When the first tear fell, he wiped it away with his thumb. "I'm sorry," he whispered before kissing her.

"It probably will," she conceded, "but it's there and I'm fighting it."

"Don't ask me to accept it." He knew it came out as pleading but right then he didn't care.

"I'm asking you to accept _me_ ," she clarified. "It's a part of me, Bill."

He wiped away the next tear that fell then kissed her again. "I do accept you, Laura." He almost said he loved her but that had made her cry the night before so he kept it to himself. He had vowed upon seeing the tears that he wouldn't bring it up again until she did.

"Touch me," she whispered before claiming his lips.

Rolling on top of her, he sucked on her ear lobe before kissing his way down her neck. The tears stung his eyes as he nervously reached out to touch her cancer-stricken breast. His fingers shook the closer he got and finally stilled when he came into contact.

The first caress felt barely there but he was trying. One of his tears fell on her so she reached up to wipe his face as he had done for her. His fingers were moving slowly over her breast, touching all of it eventually. She felt another tear fall as he palmed it and began very gently kneading it, his other hand doing the same to her healthy one. Her heart was breaking at how much her illness hurt him, how much the idea of losing her was tearing him up inside.

He swirled his tongue around her nipple then mouthed her breast, bringing forth a moan. Hesitating, he looked up at her and saw her tears building up again. Realizing how much ignoring the cancer hurt her, he worked up the courage to repeat his actions on the breast he preferred to ignore but, for her sake, wouldn't any longer. She moaned again as his tongue slowly moved over and around her nipple and even louder when he sucked on it before mouthing her breast.

She wiped his tears when he looked up at her again. She whispered, "Thank you," before kissing him and rolling them over.

It wasn't until she was kissing her way down his scar, that he realized where she was headed. "Come here, Laura," he rasped.

"I will," she teased, holding his member with one hand while licking her lips. He groaned when she mouthed him, applied suction and began moving along him. Wanting him inside her, she only indulged herself in bringing him pleasure for a few moments before moving up to kiss him, rubbing herself on the head of his member. Sitting up, she slid him inside her and smiled as his hand moved to her core. Eyes closed, she rode him slowly, losing herself with him. Just about to go over the edge, she felt his hand move from her core to her breast and the walls came tumbling down. She felt the waves crashing into the shore, spreading warmth throughout her body. She felt the tears well up and threaten to fall. One by one they did until he pulled her to him and rolled them back over.

"I love you, Laura," he rasped, upset with himself that he had brought it up so soon. "I accept you." In an attempt to avoid further discussion, he pushed into her and began moving slowly.

"I know you do, Bill," she managed to get out, her voice letting him know her emotions had broken their barrier. She held onto him tightly as she matched him thrust for thrust and kissed away any tears that escaped before he regained control over his own emotions. He did the same for her until no more tears fell.

Emotions under control for both, they began moving a little faster together, kissing deeper and whispering words of comfort. When she fell over the edge again, he joined her. Holding him tightly to her, she found she wasn't ready to let go of him. Realizing it was more than just physical had her kissing the side of his head a few times before he turned to claim her lips.

"It's okay, I won't push you, Laura," he promised and she could tell he was getting emotional again which brought out her own.

"I'm sorry, Bill," she murmured.

"Don't be." Though he had slipped out of her, he wanted to remain close to her, didn't want to break the tight hold she had on him, and didn't want her walls to go back up. There, in his bed, she was the most open with him. He wanted that for as long as he could have it.

Once they were both able to let go, he moved onto his back, pleasantly surprised when she moved over to him, putting her head on his chest and letting her fingers caress his skin.

He knew her insistence for her own quarters would rear up again so he'd have to actually look but he could do so slowly and perhaps, in time, she'd change her mind.

[ **TBC** ]


	3. Chapter 3

_**More Than Just Feeing Good, Ch 3**_

 **Disclaimer** : I own nothing related to _Battlestar Galactica._

 **A/N** : By the time they were ready to leave to start their day, she was back to looking strong and determined but Bill knew beneath the surface lurked his fragile and lost Laura.

 **A/N2** : _Enjoy_! Please leave a _review_ if y'all's feel so inclined. They are ever so lovely to read and _much_ appreciated. # **TodayIsLife**

~~~~~PT~~~~~

Three weeks later, the Press found out about the Demetrius. Saying it was a military operation and that he didn't discuss rumors didn't stop the reporters from asking more questions.

Left alone with Laura in her office, Bill knew it was coming. She had promised to cover his ass but she wasn't happy about it then and still wasn't now. His repeated explanation did nothing to calm her as evidenced by her soft, yet stern, " _Apparently_ ," before she sat at her desk, dismissing him with her action.

Entering his quarters, he didn't see her at the desk working. Grabbing a drink on his way into the living room, unbuttoning his jacket as he walked, he saw her sitting curled up on the couch. Removing the jacket after he put his drink down, he explained, "Just one," then paused, "for our talk."

"We knew they'd find out," she stated simply.

"Yeah," he grunted in agreement, sitting down next to her. "And you're even more pissed than you were."

She thought about what he'd said, thought about having to deal with Lee as a member of the Quorum and how she was still upset with him, then brought herself back to their conversation. "I am," she admitted.

"I can't change that," he said before taking a big sip of the alcohol he craved.

"No, you can't," she agreed. "So what happens now?"

"We keep doing what we're doing." It wasn't really an answer but he hadn't thought the whole plan through when he'd decided to let Kara take the Demetrius and try to find Earth.

"The Press will keep doing what they're doing," she sighed.

"Yeah, we're kinda screwed on this one." He looked at her with an apology in his eyes that he wouldn't voice. "Kara will be back hopefully with some good news you can give the frakking Press."

"Hopefully." She moved closer to him and trailed her fingertips along his jaw line. It was set showing how stressed he was. "Hi," she greeted.

He smiled and greeted her in return. "Hi. That's it?" he asked, surprised she'd given up so easily.

"I'll deal with it," she pointed at him, "and I'll deal with you but for now, I'm done." She kissed him, he deepened it. Moving to straddle him, she whispered, "I think we have a little time before dinner gets here."

In between kisses, he managed to say, "I want more than a little time." When sadness crossed her eyes, changing them from green to grey, he realized how it could be taken and, rather than apologize, he kissed her deeply and pushed her skirt up.

"It's okay, Bill, it's all right," she assured him. "We'll make love later."

"As often as we can for as long as we can, that's what we want," he reminded her.

Standing up, she reached her hand out to him which he took and gladly followed her to his bedroom.

~~~~~# # #~~~~~

A couple of weeks later, Laura was in Bill's quarters, still stewing about Lee's attempt to upstage her at the full Quorum meeting with Zarek's assistance.

"You going to keep pacing or talk about it?" He sat on the couch and got himself comfortable.

"The members of the Quorum are as bad as children most days but today, _today_ they managed to be even worse," she complained while continuing to pace.

"How's Lee doing on it?" He was curious but wasn't sure he should ask. He'd been hearing things, hearing how his son felt a sense of loyalty to Zarek for nominating him.

"It might be a good idea for me not to answer that," she warned.

"He did something. What?"

"He brought up a classified document, Executive Order 112, in front of the whole frakking bunch of them."

"Classified? How'd he get that?" he asked; genuine surprise and annoyance blending in his expression.

"Tom Zarek," she sighed.

"My son is helping a terrorist. I can't condone that." He walked over to her. "I know you two don't get along anymore. I'm always here for you." Wrapping his arms around her, he felt how wound up she was. "Want a massage before dinner arrives?"

"I would love one," she smiled then kissed him. She knew massages normally led to making love but they didn't have time for that. Simply a massage would have to do until they went to bed later.

~~~~~# # #~~~~~

A few mornings later, she saw hair on her pillow. She'd been seeing that often but this time there was _so_ much. Not wanting Bill to hear her, Laura covered her mouth to stifle the sobs she couldn't hold back once the panic passed.

His arm moved around her and she heard him remind her about the deal they'd made after the first time they made love. Making no move to get up, he held her until the tears subsided. Once she was ready, they went into the bathroom and he cut what was left of her hair to make it easier to shave off. Looking at her in the mirror as he worked, he saw the tears flood her eyes then spill over.

"Keep going, please," she said in response to a question asked only with his eyes.

When it was time to use the razor, he asked her if she wanted to do it herself. Shaking her head _no_ , she wiped her tears and under her nose.

He went to work slowly and methodically to avoid cutting her. Feeling helpless watching her silently cry, he picked up his pace. When he was done, he wiped the shaving cream off her head and kissed it. She put her arms around him and wept noiselessly into his shoulder.

Hearing from Cottle that she wasn't improving as he had hoped unnerved him; she always seemed so strong and determined. In his arms, crying over what her bald head meant, she seemed fragile and lost.

Before long, his eyes filled and the tears rolled down his cheeks and onto her face. She felt them once her sobs subsided and tenderly removed them as he did the same for her. Turning her to look into the mirror, he assured her, "Your hair isn't you. It's _not_ why people care." Knowing what she was going to say, he added, "It's not why I love you, Laura."

"I'm dying, Bill," she whispered as she turned back around to face him. "The treatment isn't working as well as it should."

"I know," he admitted then told her he had asked her doctor as a friend to both of them and gotten the update. "Cottle figured out how I feel about you so he told me."

A small smile appeared. "I thought so." She could've said more, could've mentioned all the good things his friend said about him but she decided against it.

"Let's make love," he suggested, wanting to keep his word to her.

She couldn't imagine him still wanting her and so she offered him an out. Not taking it, he kissed her head, her nose, her lips, and then moved along her neck before leading her back to his bed.

He did everything he could think of to make her feel better, to feel loved and wanted, and to still feel beautiful because she _was_ to him. By the time they were finished making love, they were both exhausted but the shower they shared reenergized them.

Putting on the wig for the first time, she looked at herself in the mirror and the tears sprang forth once again. Holding her from behind, he told her she was still beautiful then let her adjust to this new event in her life on her own.

By the time they were ready to leave to start their day, she was back to looking strong and determined but Bill knew beneath the surface lurked his fragile and lost Laura.

[ **The** **End** ]


End file.
